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by starbrightlovers



Series: it's the hard-knock life [1]
Category: Hamilton - Miranda
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Coming Out, Gen, Genderfluid Lafayette, foster parent washingtons, ftm alexander
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-03-27
Updated: 2016-03-27
Packaged: 2018-05-29 08:25:42
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,027
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6366766
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/starbrightlovers/pseuds/starbrightlovers
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>He spent weeks whispering to himself "I'm a boy. I am not Ava." and struggling to delete his search history in case someone checked it.</p><p>[alexander is a trans boy and the washingtons are his foster parents.]</p>
            </blockquote>





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**Author's Note:**

> i'm a dfab demigirl & i apologize if any of my information is inaccurate!! please correct me & i will gladly fix it if something is wrong. also i totally changed the timeline so the hurricane happened when alex was fourteen otherwise the whole foster parent thing wouldn't have made as much sense. i also think nevis is probably more technologically advanced than i'm making it out to be, but the main idea is that alex had no computer or internet access.

Alexander wished he could say he'd always known he wasn't a girl, but it couldn't be farther from the truth.

He'd spent his life on the tiny island of Nevis until he was thirteen, and there was no time to consider his gender then. His father took off and his mother died two years later, leaving him with only a cousin and a brother, but they didn't last long either. The stress of living so poorly was too much for his cousin, and James? He decided he was too old to stick around any longer and ditched him the second he turned 21.

There wasn't much to do as a tiny thirteen year old girl in Nevis. He did his best to trade for food and water, but everything was ripped away yet again when the hurricane struck. American missionaries came through after that, and took Alexander and a handful of other children back with them. Alex spent three months getting bounced around between households, and finally ended up with the Washingtons.

They had a foreign exchange student staying with them, a freshman called Lafayette who used pronouns like "they" and "them", something Alex had never heard of. They spoke more French than English, and was more patient than any other person Alex had ever known. They wore skirts and dresses and sometimes make-up, and always wanted to give makeovers.

After meeting them, Alex had immediately checked his beaten-up dictionary for "genderfluidity" but came up empty-handed. Maybe his dictionary was out of date? He'd tried to ask Mr. Washington for a new one, but was instead shown how to use Google.

It was kind of a mess to learn about it all. There were more new concepts than he'd expected, and as he read he slowly realized he wasn't a girl.

He spent weeks whispering to himself "I'm a boy. I am not Ava." and struggling to delete his search history in case someone checked it. He wasn't sure how to handle it. For the most part, he engulfed himself in books. It was in one of the books where he found his own name- Alexander. It wouldn't mess with his initials. There was no middle name to be worried about, and the definition of the name was simply "man". He could even just go by Alex and not worry about coming out to strangers.

He did, however, need to worry about coming out to the Washingtons. Considering their attitude towards Laf, he wasn't too concerned about being accepted, but he would be starting high school in two months, and if he wanted to go by Alex he needed to say something before they started registration.

"Ava, dinner is ready!" called Mrs. Washington from downstairs.

Alex was not ready for dinner. He was content to stay laying on his bed and staring at the glow-in-the-dark stars Lafayette had arranged in a heart.

Reluctantly, he pulled himself up. He was wearing an oversized hoodie he'd stolen from Laf and jean shorts that could not have been a more awkward length. It was the best he could do to hide his chest and pretend he didn't have soft lumps of flesh sitting there with no purpose other than infuriating him.

"Ah, a baguette! You are embracing my heritage tonight, I see!" Lafayette's voice echoed from the kitchen as he descended the stairs. George and Martha laughed and Alex was sure Mr. Washington had ruffled Laf's hair. He could only hope this laughter wouldn't be cut short by his announcement.

"Ava!" Mr. Washington exclaimed as he arrived in the kitchen. Everyone was already seated around the table, a plate of spaghetti waiting for Alex. "We need to get you some proper summer clothes.

"Um. Right. About that," he said as he slid into the wooden chair. "I don't know the best place to buy clothes? Or any of my clothing sizes? Especially because I'm not a girl and I'm scared people will judge me for shopping in the men's section," he rushed out, fighting the urge to clap a hand over his mouth, instead just staring down at his lap.

Lafayette placed a comforting hand on Alex's shoulder, rubbing their thumb in circles. "Mon oeuf, it is okay to be afraid. I will help you."

Alex exhaled heavily and took a few seconds to try and even out his breathing. Lafayette was fine with it. Lafayette would help him. Now the Washingtons just needed to respond.

"Do you want to use a different name?" Mrs. Washington asked gently. Mr. Washington made an odd sound, and Alex looked up to see that his mouth was full of spaghetti.

"Alexander. Or Alex. And he/him pronouns, please," he murmured quietly, bringing up a hand to grab a piece of garlic bread.

There was a quiet moment, and Alex's mind took the moment to remind him that this was possibly the first time anyone had been so accepting of him since the death of his mother. His breathing shifted again and he started to cry. He put the garlic bread back on his plate.

"Hey, hey, it's okay," Mr. Washington said, voice a bit muffled by pasta. Alex heard the screech of wood chair against tile floor and then felt the warm hands of his foster father around his shoulders. "We're not going to put you back in the system."

Alex let out a weird, laughy sob and tucked his head into George's elbow. "Thank you," he said quietly. Mr. Washington let him go and returned to his chair, warm eyes still focused on Alex. "Can clothes shopping maybe wait a few more days?" he asked through his sniffles.

Martha laughed softly, but nodded. "It can wait as long as you'd like, sweetheart."

Alex mumbled another thank you before shoveling a forkful of pasta into his mouth.

There was another moment of quiet, but he was not as uncomfortable with it this time. He could hear the low tones of whatever terrible sitcom George had been watching in the main room while he graded college papers, and the barking of the neighbor's dog outside. It felt like home. Alex smiled into his spaghetti.

**Author's Note:**

> lafayette's pet name for alex is "mon oeuf" which is just "my egg".


End file.
